Om shanti Om ka dialogue Students ke andaaz mein

Itni shiddat se maine paas hone ki koshish ki hai,,,,,



ki har teacher ne mujhe marks na dene ki saazish ki hai,,,,,



Agar tum kisi paper mein paas hona chahte ho,,,



to saari kaaynat tumhe usko paas karane me lag jati hai,,,,,,



Ye exams bhi apne hindi filmon ki tarah hote hain,,,,,



end tak sab kuch achha ho hi jata hai-HAPPYYYYS ENDINGGGGS.. ....



aur agar aisa nahi hota,,,,,





toh exam abhi khatam nahi hua,


.


SUPPLEMENTARY abhi baaki hai mere dost........ ........ ha ha ha.




"33 marks ki kimat,

tum kya jaano lecturer babu.....

har student ka khwaab hota hai....33 marks.

It's all in the punctuation:

An English professor wrote the words, "Woman without her man is nothing" on the blackboard and directed his students to punctuate it correctly.

The men wrote: "Woman, without her man, is nothing."

The women wrote: "Woman: Without her, man is nothing."

 

sardar....ha...ha...ha...

 

 Sardar: My mobile bill how much?

 

 Call centre girl: sir, just dial 123 to know current bill status

 

 Sardar: Stupid, not CURRENT BILL my MOBILE BILL.

 

***************

 

 Sardar: I think that girl is deaf..

 

 Friend: How do u know?

 

 Sardar: I told I Love her, but she said her chappals are new

 

***************

 

 

 Teacher: Which is the oldest animal in world?

 

 Sardar: ZEBRA

 

 Teacher: How?

 

 Sardar: Bcoz it is Black & White

 

***************

 

 

 Sardar: Miss, Do u called 2 my mobile?

 

 Teacher: Me? No, why?

 

 Sardar: Yesterday I saw in my mobile- "1 Miss Call".

 

 

***************

 

 Question: "Should Women have Children after 35?"

 

 Smart Sardar Replied: "No! 35 Children R More than Enough!!"

 

***************

 

 

 Sir: What is difference between Orange and Apple?

 

 Sardar: Color of Orange is orange, but color of Apple is not APPLE.

 

***************

 

 

 Sardar attending an interview in Software Company.

 

 Manager: Do U know MS Office?

 

 Sardar: If U give me the address I will go there sir.

 

***************

 

 

 Sardar in airplane going 2 Bombay .. While its landing he shouted: "

 

 Bombay Bombay "

 

 Air hostess said: "B silent."

 

 Sardar: "Ok. Ombay. Ombay"

 

 

***************

 

 

 Sardar got a sms from his girl friend:"I MISS YOU"

 

 Sardarji replied:> "I Mr YOU" !!.

 

 

***************

 

 

 Sardar: Doctor! My Son swallowed a key

 

 Doctor: When?

 

 Sardar: 3 Months Ago

 

 Dr:Wat were u doing till now?

 

 Sardar: We were using duplicate key

 

 

***************

 

 

 Why Sardar opens his lunch box in the middle of the road???

 

 Just 2 confirm whether he is going to or coming back from the

office....

 

 

***************

 

 

 After finishing MBBS, Sardar started his practice.

 

 He first checked the Patient's Eyes, Tongue & Ears By Torch & Finallly

 

 Said:

 

 Torch is okay"

 

 

***************

 

 

 

 

 

last wish

Cannibals capture three men. The men are told that they will be skinned and eaten and then their skin will be used to make canoes.

 

Then they are each given a final request.

 

The first man asks to be killed as quickly and painlessly as possible. His request is granted, and they poison him.

 

The second man asks for paper and a pen so that he can write a farewell letter to his family.

 

This request is granted, and after he writes his letter, they kill him saving his skin for their canoes.

 

Now it is the third man's turn. He asks for a fork.

 

The cannibals are confused, but it is his final request, so they give him a fork.

 

As soon as he has the fork he begins stabbing himself all over and shouts, "To hell with your canoes!"

 

hard to wear glasses

Merv was in a terrible accident at work. He fell through a floor tile and ripped off both of his ears. Since he was permanently disfigured, he settled with the company for a rather large sum of money and went on his way. One day, Merv decided to invest his money in a small, but growing telecom business called Plexus Communications. After weeks of negotiations, he bought the company outright. But, after signing on the dotted line, he realized that he knew nothing about running such a business and quickly set out to hire someone who could do that for him.

The next day he had set up three interviews. The first guy was great. He knew everything he needed to and was very interesting. At the end of the interview, Merv asked him, "Do you notice anything different about me?" And the gentleman answered, "Why yes, I couldn't help but notice you have no ears." Merv got very angry and threw him out.

The second interview was with a woman, and she was even better than the first guy. He asked her the same question, "Do you notice anything different about me?" and she replied: "Well, you have no ears." Merv again was upset and tossed her out.

The third and last interview was the best of all three. It was with a very young man who was fresh out of college. He was smart. He was handsome. And he seemed to be a better businessman than the first two put together. Merv was anxious, but went ahead and asked the young man the same question: "Do you notice anything different about me?" And to his surprise, the young man answered: "Yes. You wear contact lenses."

Merv was shocked, and said, "What an incredibly observant young man. How in the world did you know that?"

The young man fell off his chair laughing hysterically and replied, "Well, it's pretty hard to wear glasses with no ears!"

 

elevator

An Antartian boy and his father were visiting a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again.

The boy asked his father, "What is this, Father?" The father [never having seen an elevator] responded "Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is."

While the boy and his father were watching wide-eyed, an old lady in a wheel chair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room.

The walls closed and the boy and his father watched small circles of lights with numbers above the walls light up. They continued to watch the circles light up in the reverse direction.

The walls opened up again and a beautiful 24-year-old woman stepped out. The father said to his son, "Go get your mother."